“See that none render evil for evil unto any man; but ever follow that which is good, both among yourselves, and to all men…” (1 Thessalonians 5:15).
How do you resolve a conflict where both parties feel that they have been wronged and both feel equally justified in their anger and bitterness? This can often feel like a stale-mate situation.
But all it takes is one person with the character and determination to decide to do what is right. If you are a child of God through faith in Christ, you can – and should – respond with the kindness and patience of the Spirit of God rather than the revengeful and impatient spirit of man (Philippians 4:13). We can “obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need” (Hebrews 4:16).
If someone has wronged and hurt you, you do not need to retaliate in kind. Two wrongs do not make a right. Your response is always subject to your will. You always have a choice. You do not need to be hateful, angry, or cruel to a person who hurts you.
Conflict begins at the point when you allow yourself to have hurt feelings and then you choose to nurse that hurt and dwell upon it. Proverbs 15:18 says, “A wrathful man stirreth up strife: but he that is slow to anger appeaseth strife.”
There is never any Biblical justification for anger or bitterness – “For the wrath of man worketh not the righteousness of God” (James 1:20). Take the Biblical high ground and choose to do what is right. Do not respond with your emotions, but with your will, choose to respond Biblically and graciously. Paul says in Romans 12:21, “Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good.”
Morris Hull, Home Life Ministries